Helping Athletes Manage Sports Performance Anxiety
Kylie Smith • Alignwell Modern Therapy • Bellevue, WA
The Hidden Struggles Behind the Game
Sports can bring out the best in us: drive, focus, teamwork, and pride. But they can also bring a ton of pressure. If you’ve ever felt your stomach twist before a game or caught yourself replaying a mistake long after it happened, you’re not alone. For a lot of athletes, “how I play” becomes “who I am.” When that happens, a missed shot or a bad practice can feel personal. The love for the sport can start to fade under the weight of expectations.
When Sports Become Identity
Being an athlete isn’t just what you do; it’s part of how you see yourself. It shapes your schedule, your friendships, and your confidence. But when your identity becomes all about performance, things can get tricky. If you’re injured, benched, or struggling, it can feel like you’ve lost a piece of yourself. Therapy helps athletes find that middle ground where they can care deeply about their sport without losing sight of who they are outside of it.
What Performance Anxiety Can Look Like
Performance anxiety doesn’t care if you’re a kindergartner in soccer cleats or a college athlete chasing a scholarship. It shows up in all kinds of ways. Maybe your child gets teary before every game. Maybe you notice your teens pushing themselves too hard or being extra critical. Or maybe, as an adult athlete, you’re feeling tense, distracted, or burnt out. You might notice racing thoughts, tightness in your chest, irritability, or that “frozen” feeling right before competition. Others lose motivation or stop having fun altogether.
What Parents Can Do
Parents, you have more influence than you might realize. Kids and teens often take their cues from you. Focus on effort over outcome. Celebrate growth, teamwork, and courage, not just wins or stats. Try to stay calm and supportive after tough games. Ask curious questions like, “How did that feel for you?” instead of jumping into advice mode. And make sure your athlete has time for rest, hobbies, and connection outside of sports. That balance helps them stay grounded and enjoy the process again.
How Therapy Can Support Athletes
Therapy gives athletes a chance to breathe, reflect, and remember why they started playing in the first place. We might work on grounding techniques to calm nerves before competition, or visualization to boost confidence. Mindfulness helps athletes stay in the moment instead of getting stuck on mistakes. CBT helps challenge harsh self-talk. IFS helps athletes understand and care for the inner parts of themselves that feel scared or pressured to be perfect. There’s no one-size-fits-all approach. It’s about finding what works for you and building tools to handle the pressure in a healthy way. At Alignwell Modern Therapy in Bellevue, WA, athletes of all ages come in for exactly this kind of support.
Finding Joy in the Game Again
Sports are supposed to be fun. They’re supposed to challenge and inspire you, not drain you. If you or your child is feeling weighed down by pressure or perfectionism, therapy can help. Together, we can build confidence, manage anxiety, and rediscover what made the game meaningful in the first place.
Reach out today to schedule a session or consultation with Alignwell Modern Therapy in Bellevue, WA. Let’s help you or your athlete find joy, balance, identity, and confidence both on and off the field.